Flirtology is a science-based method of teaching flirting. Using scientific research, and proven flirting techniques, I can help anyone to become a Fearless Flirter.
I have helped thousands of others, and I can help you too. Are you ready to take a major fork in the road, which will positively affect the rest of your life? Welcome to Flirtology!
Today’s post is in response to a member of the Flirtology community, who writes, ‘I would like to learn anything that will help me to feel more confident and less self-conscious, and generally enjoy flirting and dating more.’
If you are looking at flirting as a ‘must do’ or are approaching dating like a job interview, are you surprised that you’re not getting anywhere? This is supposed to be fun, and even thrilling! If you’re not feeling this, than you are coming about it from the wrong way. I’d be happy to help you with more specific advice, in the form of private coaching, but in the meantime, start implementing the points below, and feel a change immediately.
1) Don’t expect the other person to make you happy, fill missing gaps in your life, or do anything for you. You should already be doing that for yourself. But, work on yourself is the key.
In my research for my book, The Flirt Interpreter, I found there were 6 signs that show someone likes you. The simple acronym for these signs is Hot Ape. You can click on all of the links to learn more.
H – Humour
O – Open Body Language
T – Touch
A – Attention
P – Proximity
E – Eye Contact
There is such a fabulous Flirtology community out there. In fact, once people have gone through my private coaching sessions, I add them to my Wing-women group, so they have a group of fun and like-minded people to do activities with. (Btw-this includes men too!) Most recently, I organized bowling and dancing for us. It was a very fun night, to say the least. During the bowling portion of the evening, we asked the group of guys next to us for bowling tips; we crashed a few games of table tennis, and we danced our hearts out to some 80’s music. Along the way, we met loads of nice people, exchanged a few numbers, and I think a snog might have happened (but you didn’t hear it from me).
As I was leaving, I grabbed my coat from the chair and saw a guy standing there holding two large drinks. Still in good form and high camaraderie, I said to him, ‘You must be thirsty!’. There was no reaction; he looked through me. One second later a woman appeared, they whispered to each other, she gave me a look, and then they both turned their backs towards me. I was stunned at their reaction. My first thought was, ‘I didn’t just ask you for a shag, relax mate!’ My second thought was to feel sorry for them. What kind of life must they have to be so cold and closed? But, finally, I realized that they were free to act however they’d like. It was not their job to respond in a manner that I deem fitting. I am free to say something, and they are free to react how they choose. As one of my private clients said to me, after being part of my 6 session package, and thus approaching and interacting with lots of people, ‘95% of the time, people are really happy to have a conversation’. She’s right. And this is their choice as well. (It just happens to mesh better, with what you’d like!)
Time for your mid-week minis, my friends!
- Stop Comparing yourself to others – Besides, you only get the Facebook highlights anyway, not the true picture.
- Focus on what you do have – start a gratitude journal and focus your attention on the have’s, not the have-not’s.
- Stay in the present. It’s the only ‘real’ tense anyway. Connect with your breath and focus more on the other person as practical tools.
- Do more things that make you feel good: sing, make things, go for a run.
- Help others. The less ‘me-centred’ you are, the happier you will be.